I was listening to a podcast the other day and this phrase, Goofy Loop, came up.
For some context the podcast was Small Town Dicks, which is co-hosted by two twin detectives, and they tell stories of some of their law enforcement exploits and cases. If you’re into true crime or wanting knowledge about behind the scenes police work, it’s a great podcast for that.
Anyway, getting back to the point. In episode 6 of said podcast the discussion turned to a phrase that these particular detectives use called the Goofy Loop. The term is used to describe a pattern of behaviour when the fight, flight or freeze reaction occurs. Usually in response to stress, trauma or in a critical moment (could be acute or chronic scenarios). Generally, your body or mind will choose one of these three survival responses as a reaction to the stress or trauma. The detectives in the podcast described the Goofy Loop as a process where your brain is attempting to reboot and trying to process what has just happened. It’s like your brain is just saying over and over “what the heck just happened?” And this is where the loop comes in because now your brain is stuck. You’ve been caught off-guard or suddenly experienced a trauma or you’ve been exposed too long to stress/trauma. So your brain is just looping over and over. And you keep repeating the same thing over and over too. Could be a thought or pattern of behaviour.
I hope all that makes sense! Because when I heard this explanation of a Goofy Loop something became apparent to me – I think I’m in a Goofy Loop!
For the past year and a half, things in my life have been unstable, scary, stressful and overwhelming. I’m essentially fine but the events of the past year have not been kind to my mental health, let’s just say that. And so, I think in the process of experiencing these stressors (which have been ongoing) my brain has decided I need to go into survival mode. All three of them. Fight, flight and freeze.
Now, in response to being in survival mode I’ve developed a certain pattern of behaviours, thoughts and ways to ‘deal with’ the stress (I say deal with loosely). These behaviours are my attempt to feel ‘safe’ in my new world/situation/life.
Here’s the thing though, not all these behaviours and thoughts are the best for me now. In the beginning they were fine as they kept me functional while everything was falling down around me. But now they are no longer serving me, they are actually hurting or hindering me from moving forward. And this is where the Goofy Loop comes in for me. I think because I’ve been doing the same pattern for so long now, I’m in a loop and my brain can’t process a way to actually get out of it. So, I’m just doing the same thing over and over again. A loop of thoughts and patterns that I repeat every day.
I want out of my Goofy Loop though. It’s getting pretty tiring if I’m honest and I need to make some changes for my health. To do that I need to get my brain off its hamster wheel!
I’ve already reached out to a couple of professional resources that can assist me and of course my BF Luke is onboard and doing his best to support me in working through all these things.
In addition to that I want to fall in love with doing activities I used to do and enjoyed. Like, reading. I no joke used to read almost a book a week. Loved reading. I want to love it again. Going for nature walks is another one that’s fallen outside of my loop. Also having a bubble bath. Anyone that knows me knows that an essential part of my personality is my love of luxurious bubble baths. I have a beautiful selection of bath products – bubble bars, bath fizzers, soaps, candles to burn and even a super soft bath pillow. But I have not even used a single one or had a bubble bath in almost 6 months now. Only essential showers for this girl.
By seeking help and doing the activities I used to love, hopefully that will help me in beginning to exit out of my Goofy Loop of a life.
Anyway, I hope all that made sense. I just wanted to share all this because maybe you’ve been stuck in a loop before and wondered if anyone else out there has too.
I realise that talking about a goofy loop is a niche thing but as soon as I heard the term and the explanation, I immediately resonated with it and felt it aptly described where I’m at right now.
So, thank you for sticking around. And if you get a chance, go listen to the podcast episode that inspired this post. It’s on my master list of podcast recommendations.
Until next time lovelies,
Amber xx
*this post is a repost from April 20, 2023
